Posts Tagged ‘God’

I found this post on Alpha Game to be a very entertaining and illuminating back and forth between an older Christian man denouncing Game and Deti, Vox and Yohami to name but a few.  The OP was originally about a socially inept liberal manboob’s rant calling Roissy an asshole for his writing about Game, women’s natural hypergamy, and essentially the poor state of things in our morally corrupt society that has gotten rid of all restrictions on bad female behavior while shaming men who exhibit positive masculine traits.   Unfortunately this is a common stance held by the majority of men who throughout their lives, have utterly failed with women and the White Knights who proclaim themselves followers of Christ.  (There are also many secular white knight manboobs.)  Both groups, while sometime differing in their ideology, cause great harm by encouraging women to not only behave badly but they give an air of acceptance to women’s poor behaviors and downplay the consequences of those behaviors.  They are also harmful in respect to misleading men by denying the true nature of women (they think they are all special snowflakes) and denying all levels of Game.

It’s interesting to note a few things found not in the article per se, but in the comment section.  The first issue of import is that all women are in fact sexual beings.  I even read something recently that stated that women are in fact more sexual than men.  I can see some truth in that.  For the sake of staying on topic we can put that aside for now. The important issue is that all men and women, in and out of the Church are members of the SMP.  Whether they are married or not is also irrelevant because even in marriage couple have sex, or at least they should be doing so, exclusively with each other of course.

As Deti stated here, even women in the Church are looking for sex with attractive men.  In fact some of these women may even have husbands.  You can go into any medium or large sized church and see that the women are dressed not for church but for the Sunday Morning Nightclub.  I think the short skirts and panty shots should be proof enough.  However too many men will try so hard to tell us aware men that these women are all good girls when in fact many of them are reformed (born again) sluts.

I encourage you to read the article and the comments for a pretty good debate that shows how Game is not only valid but a necessary component to not only meeting women but maintain a happy marriage.  I will point out that Game itself is not immoral.  Some aspect such as banging many different hot women may infuriate the moralist in some of you, but before you condemn game, lets condemn the behaviors of women and our society at large, like female sexual promiscuity and no fault divorce that gave rise to the necessity of Game in every man’s life and in every mans marriage.

Personally I like having sex with a variety of attractive women, but I prefer the special connection found only in a monogamous relationship with one woman I can love and trust.  However those women are exceedingly rare.  Because of this I am selective about the woman I have sex with by my choice, not social ineptitude.   Game and my naturally attractive persona give me this ability to not only make this choice but to be choosy.  Without Game I am susceptible to not only falling into beta behaviors in a comfortable monogamous relationship with a woman and thus would encourage the premature end to the relationship, I would only have 2nd or 3rd tier women to choose from or be chosen from.

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By: MonkeyWerks

I was directly criticized by Jesse Powell in this article on Secular Patriarchy concerning an essay I wrote explaining how women never fully appreciate the sacrifices we make for them as men and how a man living a simpler life free from the obligations and insistent demands of a woman might be something worth working towards.  Because of the issues he raised, I think a response was warranted if for no other reason but to point out he is an uber white knight beta and to expose the movement as one that promotes beliefs that are really quite harmful.  Plus I wanted to stretch my legs, ok my fingers, a bit before I wrote about more important topics.

I have never had one of my essays ripped apart by a pseudo feminism writer before.  Maybe I’m finally getting to the big time.  I actually had to read some of his articles to see what this person or movement was all about because I do try to be intellectually honest.  I was bit shocked at what I read, although I probably shouldn’t have been.  When I first started reading I thought a woman wrote it.  I now know the article criticizing me came from a man although the writing sounded very female-eqe at first.  The shaming language was as such that I normally expect from a female writer who have nothing more substantial to say than for me to “man up” and give everything that I own now and in the future to my ex wife or to any other woman who blesses me access to their warm and moist nether regions.

Apparently the ideology Secular Patriarchy promotes is nothing more than feminism in sexy panties where the woman benefits from the sweat, labors and protection of the man while having to give very little in return.  Actually this is what mainstream feminism and most American say women really want, however they usually only respond sexually to the skittles man.  The only differences between regular feminism and SP are that the woman stays at home and does not contribute to the household finances and the man must somehow “protect” the woman even up to needlessly putting his own life in danger.  As one commentator pointed out that Powell made a grand pretense that no (male) expense should be spared for women’s (supposed) protections.  This assertion goes along with a really disturbing statement I found that Powell made in that he promotes the idea that men SHOULD be so against rape that even in the case of a false rape accusations he believes that men should still be willing to be imprisoned, to serve the greater good, which is serving women at ANY cost (to men).  Powell believes that men should simply put all women on pedestals, worship them, and for men to serve all women, and as the woman sees fit mind you.  He goes on to explain that men should work their tails off to provide for woman’s lifestyles and all of the woman’s wants, desires and comforts without requiring them to contribute or even reciprocate.  He calls this unconditional chivalry.  He actually states that women are superior to men in many ways.  His value of men is so low that his beliefs do not even spare men from being falsely accused of crimes.  Personally, I would rather 1000 alleged rapist go free instead of even 1 man be falsely accused or imprisoned.

Sunshine Mary invited him to debate his beliefs on her site in April of 2013.  The comments there were lively and tended to destroy the assertions he was attempting to make.  Powell claims to be an atheist and states that he loves women and serves God, but it’s obvious that his god is really women the feminine imperative, and the ideology he promotes.  He further elaborates this point, but it becomes clear that his beliefs that what he states is unbiblical and goes against the natural order of things.   It’s interesting that even atheists try to distance themselves from him.  He does seem very schizophrenic in his theology.  Seeing as he is a ardent supporter of Mark Driscoll’s incessant “man up” and white knightery sermons its no surprise that many of his beliefs promote the feminine imperative in such a grotesque fashion.

Although it became pretty painful to read because he had genuine problems common with nice guys and beta males but he just took the wrong road in trying to fix the problems. I was able to learn a good bit about him by reading several of his articles.

He admits to being a feminist since a very young age and being raised by a domineering feminist mother who likely subjected his father to never ending belittlement.  I am sure the example his father set for him growing up was that of a passive and submissive man.  He states that he was a feminist until his mid 20’s when he started believing in Secular Patriarchy.

He apparently had a rough time in high school where he did not have many friends, and that he also had difficulty meeting girls and getting them to go out with him.  He also stated that he was afraid of the girls in school reacting adversely to him expressing his “strong” feeling the girls “inspired” in him.  He goes on to explain he never had a girlfriend until he was 17 years old and failed with women until he became involved in the patriarchy movement in his mid 20’s.  I think it should be noted that his experiences with women in 11th and 12th grade influences his belief system today so much so he dedicates an entire essay to it.  Below are a few excerpts that illuminate why Powell thinks the way that he does:

Of course it is not enough to just admire and think good thoughts about women from afar. At some point I have to “get close” to women and try to actually get a woman to like me and form an actual real relationship with a woman. This is where things got a bit more difficult. I had partial success I would say in high school but not real success. There was always a barrier I couldn’t overcome or get through. I was not “good enough.” I did not have enough to offer. I could not compete with my competition.

My rejection by women in high school was the beginning of me wanting to “improve myself” and to try to figure out a way I could actually be of value in a woman’s life. I loved women plenty, I could definitely give my love to a woman and be nice to her and be concerned about her and care about her and stuff like that but that wasn’t enough. I had to have something “more” that I could offer, what this “more” was exactly was not so easy for me to figure out and was even harder for me to actually develop and possess. Still I had to be more and possess more and give more somehow.

Being rejected by the woman I was primarily interested in in high school gave me a greater respect for women and for her needs and her legitimate interests as a woman in particular. Being rejected by her instilled in me a greater sense of duty and commitment to her and towards women overall. I failed her, I didn’t have enough to offer her, I didn’t love her enough in the concrete ways I should have loved her. I was too focused on myself and not enough focused on her well being as a woman.

More from his essay:

In high school I never viewed myself as being “dominant,” the thought would have turned my stomach I am sure. I would have thought of such an “assertion of power” as being cruel and a betrayal of the woman I loved and wanted to be in a relationship with and I would have assumed such a power assertion would have been a great threat and a great turn off to the woman likely leading me to be promptly dumped which would have been a big disaster for me….

Nobody in my life; neither my family nor anyone at school nor any messages from the wider culture; ever taught me how to be a man. Nobody gave me the slightest clue how to treat women or what my role in relation to women was or that I had any kind of duties towards women whatsoever. On the contrary I received negative messages about masculinity meant to undermine me and weaken me and attack any positive protective or assertive impulses I had within myself towards women.

(Emphasis mine)

He explains how until his “conversion” he would “do anything to get whatever woman he liked to like him and be his girlfriend” and admits that there was a “shield” that prohibited him in getting too close to his love interests.  He speaks about how he thinks he could not compete with the other boys because “he was not good enough” or did not have enough to offer women.  He goes on explaining that after high school any relationships he did find himself in “fizzled” very quickly and his ability to meet women was even weaker than when he was in high school.

His conversion to this belief system is based on his inner conversations of what he THOUGHT he had to offer a woman (and what he incorrectly thought women wanted) in any relationship with him.  He ended up having “strong desires” to take care of and provide for a few particular women he had strong feelings for, which he ends up admitting was idealistic.  He then decided that he wanted his future wife to stay home, raise children and take care of the home while he worked.  In his words he wanted to “take care of” and “give a good life” to the woman he loved.

He explained that he “kept an eye on“and “noticed” the girls he was interested in.  The way he explained it gave me the stalker creepy feeling.  I can just imagine how he makes the women who are the target of his attentions feel.  The biggest thing I noticed in his essay about how high school girls shaped his current belief system concerning women in general is that it is an internal dialogue he has had with himself over the years and yet he still remains perplexed that reality does not follow his internal thoughts and desires on how women SHOULD act towards him.  Instead of having a different and more positive dialogue with himself he essentially states that he has determined that if he just serves women enough, is a nice enough guy they might just like him…someday.

What happened is Powell was an Incel and instead of learning game and the other related skills to improve his success with women he modified his lifelong indoctrination of the feminist belief system he was exposed too to include “taking care of” and overtly worshiping at the altar of the feminine goddess, thinking that maybe that will get him what he wants, a woman to love him.  He became an uber white knight and now promotes an ideology he called “unconditional chivalry”. I just cannot see him actually engaging with real women and testing his theories out.  It seems that instead of going out in the world, learning new skills and adapting one’s own personality in such a way as to get some success with women he turned his belief system into his own personal religion.

 

My Response to Him

I figured I would respond to him because the beliefs he espouses are potentially harmful as to how they sound pretty good on the surface with the woman staying at home, raising children, doing yoga to stay hot and sexy and supposedly making sammiches, but the underlying theme of his beliefs are quite sinister indeed as they are nothing but pretty lies covering up how feminism and all of its different denominations have perverted what should be the natural order to how men and women interact and relate in successful and happy relationships and in a successful society.  Another reason I was compelled to respond is that far too many men believe in this nonsense to one degree or another.  It should be clear by now, at least to readers of the sphere’ that in order for men to attract women they need to adopt a certain set of behaviors.  We call this Game.  Powell’s romanticized view of chivalry and men’s servitude towards women will do nothing for men (and in fact women) but lead them to heart break.

Women in general have an attitude of what’s yours is mine and what’s mine is mine.  I have noticed this in not only my relationships, but in the relationships of other couples I know as well.  Sometimes it is overt and sometimes this attitude is quite subtle but it is always there.

As one of my oft repeated saying from an ex states “you are just not doing what I want you to be doing”, women demand from us our resources and will often use every trick and deception to acquire them.  The woman in question wanted me to make a six figure income again even though at the time it would have had adverse health consequences for me and of course taken up all of my time.  The issue with her was not that she was lazy and wouldn’t help.  She was a very motivated and ambitious woman, which I happen to like.  The issue was the amount of income I would need to generate to pay for discretionary expenses such as her 2 horses.  Also she was adamant about have a large amount of money in saving right away (within 24 months).  It’s good to have a large savings but if you read my other essays where I described parts of our relationship you will see that there was already assets and cash set aside, it was just disproportionally hers.  She didn’t want to invest HER assets in our future plans as much as she wanted me to invest mine.  In this day and age I have no problem letting a woman do half the work, nor am I concerned if a woman makes more money than me.  I brought more than enough to the table in many other ways to more than make up for my lesser income.  In the end she wanted me to provide her a lifestyle that would have enslaved me.  It takes more than big tits and a nice ass.  Thanks but no thanks.

The woman that Powell speaks of is the proverbial Proverbs 31 woman who, by and large, do not exist in any discernibly large numbers in today’s society.  To give proper credit where due, I would say my ex wife tried hard to be that woman but her feminized church and feminist beliefs prohibited her from realizing her potential greatness.  The modern woman will always desire more and more stuff, which necessitates her husband producing more and more resources so she can have more stuff.  She will also demand through her action that her husband Game her hard at all times. It sounds like a bad deal for any man in any marital or cohabitation environment.

Powell was unable to grasp the basic understanding of my essay in that women as a gender do not understand the sacrifices we make for them and our children, nor do they appreciate the amount of work required to generate the substantial resources required to keep them fed, clothed and reasonably happy.  That’s ok though, we have, as men, been under appreciated for a few generations now.  However, we as men do have the choice to either give of ourselves to worthy women or not give anything to unworthy women.  We have no duty in either case.  I realized some time ago I am no longer obligated to give my resources to any particular woman.  Once a woman decided she no longer wanted to part of a man’s life (read have sex with the man) she no longer gets to enjoy the fruits of his labor.  I think it’s best for the majority of men to just be single and have sex with various women, or even in a committed monogamous relationship while not having to pay for women’s shit, or taking it for that matter.  If the man desires children than its best to raise the child(ren) in an intact family structure and live with the children’s mother, but still remain unmarried and protect his assets and freedom.

The main crux of my original essay was, as I will now explain Barney Style, is that instead of men working so hard they cannot enjoy their lives and have the time to pursue their other interests while still relatively young, why not consider living such a lifestyle where a man needs to only work part of the time (or as little as reasonably necessary) to provide adequate resources for himself and in my case my children only.  As in my experiences I have found a man can be quite happy doing this.

It may take some actual work at home if so inclined, such as growing your own food in a large garden, raising some livestock, learning to can and preserve food, learn another skilled trade that you always wanted to learn, etc, it is work that a man CHOOSES to do that benefits him and him alone and work that he really enjoys.  If a man has a wife or SO and she assists him in HIS mission, goals and endeavors, great!  Make it a family affair I say, so much the better, four hands are better than 2.  However in many circumstances the woman desires material goods that are unnecessary and from my observations these women have zero desire to assist the man in creating the resources.  In many cases it takes a man working so much more than necessary in order to acquire the resources to purchase the material goods, which were as originally stated, unnecessary in order to satisfy the woman.

Seeing as I do not rely on any particular woman to assist me, nor would I ever do so, I do these things myself and with my children.  I have friends that often assist and they share in production and the bounty of our activities.

The important thing is that my essay was primarily about how women today do not appreciate men’s sacrifices.  They demand the men in their lives to produce in ever increasing increments so that they may live a life of ease and comfort, all the while sacrificing the man, his health in many cases and the mans time.  Why would a man give his agency, his production, resources and his leisure time to a woman who will in the end not fully appreciate it?  Some men do choose to do this to their detriment; however I choose to live for me instead.  My children obviously benefit from my works by learning valuable skills they can use in the future if they so choose to emulate their fathers quest for personal independence.  They also have the coolest pets and eat natural foods. Powell criticizes me for “squandering” my time instead of directing all of my time to activities that would always benefit a woman.  He states that it is somehow a theft of the woman’s provisioning and it is immoral.  In response, it is the highest form of morality for a man to live foremost for himself and his mission.  In this case selfishness is the higher form of nobility.

I do have to point out that the basis of his morality is unclear and spurious seeing as he is an atheist and the moral teaching he propagates conflicts with traditional Christian beliefs.

Entropy is my God said it best in his comment on SSM’s site:

@MR JESSE POWELL

I hear a lot of blather about chivalry from a man who is too cowardly to find and dedicate himself to pure atheism, and too sure of himself and his ideas to subsume himself in a belief system with concrete tenets. Both paths take fortitude. It takes zero fortitude to stand up for what you feel (You are a special snowflake) is right. Proof is evident in all women; they worship their feelings as a god unto themselves. And for the mathematically vigilant when I say all, I say all in the statistically relevant all. By this I mean at least 95% of all women, two standard deviations from mean, all worship their feelings as divine. Begin Screeching NAWALT now.
I hereby call you a coward and would if possible, challenge you to a duel. Our pedantic and homosexualized country does not allow that though so I will curtail my response to your blatant hatred of men, and by proxy me, to this post.
Allow me to destroy your milquetoast ode to romance novels via two ways.
1. If you were man enough to embrace Christianity, first by believing that the bible isn’t the inherent and unflawed word of the ONLY God, then you would have a solid foundation upon which to base some claims on men toward women. They would not be “Chivalry” though as it is a recent addition to the lexicon and was never mentioned in any version of the bible. So if you were a Christian your thesis fails, falls flat on disbelief, and is mired in Phariseeism.
2. This is far more exciting, you fail as an atheist. You have no god, you have no moral code of absolutes. Everything is relative, nothing is wrong, nothing is right. Many so called intellectuals claim to be atheists and wonder around in a dazed myopic trance of legalism while surfing a sea of moral ambiguity. Some claim to be hedonists and do whatever it takes to feel good. All of these are abominations to the true atheist, to the one who doesn’t worship anything, to the one who literally worships nothing. Your panacea of good will and chivalry will crumble like a house of dried feces in the winds of changes that prepare to sweep this nation.

Our country for certain, but perhaps the entire world, is about to face the consequnces of our actions. We have bankrupted the entire planet. As system dynamics teaches, the more complex a system the greater the change to the system outputs when any one input is removed. We may be about to lose several. When moral codes run into the unbreakable wall of real hunger, of thirst, of sickness, and real cruelty, we will see how long your “Chivalry”, brought about only due to an unprecedented surplus of wealth, can survive. We have all been living like hogs in a vat of moral detritus. I long for the punishment to arrive, if nothing else so that the iron bar of reality comes crashing down on the paper mache you and those like you have built.

I despise your sanctimony when you have no backing for any of it. If you are an atheist then there is nothing upon which to assert any beliefs at all, ever. You prefer what you prefer and I prefer what I prefer. You prefer that men owe a never ending debt to women for all time. What you fail to take into account is the fact that no one who shares your belief system (no moral absolutes) has any, repeat, any reason to abide by this. Your silent and heartfelt prayer, to the spongy pink god of your own feminized soul, is that you can leverage the power of the state to enforce your baseless beliefs. Let me say that again, your only hope, and greatest joy, just like all other cowardly statists, is to enforce your putrid will through the leviathan of the state. You are Stalin, you are Mao, you are Hitler. You pray for an ever powerful, never-ending government body that will continue to enforce your petulant feminized whims.

(Emphasis mine)

Continuing, he goes on to point out that a woman would not have to trade her sexual intimacy or as I also put it “her cleverly disguised feigned interest in the man’s mission” in order to secure a man’s resources if I just accepted his shaming criticisms and gave freely to the woman without any expectations of positive reciprocal actions on her part.  He believes it is ALL men’s duty to do this even in light of today’s social constructs with promote frivolous divorces, divorce theft of men’s wealth and his children and the far too numerous social programs that only benefit women and harm men.  He turns the whole issue on its head when he states that a woman’s immoral behaviors in a relationship are in fact the fault of the man because he does not give freely of his time and resources to the woman and because he does not act in what Powell would define as chivalrous.  He then goes on and on about men serving women and that by serving women he hopes that they will be romantically interested in him.  As for his mission in life he believes that a woman should be a significant part of the man’s mission and that men succeed through and only because the help of a woman.  However, he then changes his mind and criticizes me because I expected my wife to assist in our family business.  He seemed to miss the part in the bible that states very clearly that a woman is a man’s helpmeet.  She was created to assist the man in his mission, not become it.

Apparently he believes that somehow by working and assisting men a woman harms herself.  He misconstrues the reality of the situation.  Both my ex wife (T) and ex girlfriend (C) worked very hard.  In fact I set up (T) in her own business once it became clear that she was unwilling to assist me in my business.  As for (C), this is a woman who reroofed her own house.  Her biggest complaint and attraction to me is that most men are incapable of doing what is historically men’s work and she fell in love with me because not only can I do all of these things I have awesome tools to do it with.  I think she loved my tools more than me, and me with my tool belt.  I do believe she would find Powell’s remarks particularly offensive.  Both woman agreed with me that woman are generally ill suited to do some types of work such as firefighting, combat roles in the military and law enforcement for example, but that does not preclude woman from swing a hammer or turning a wrench.  I suppose he would also object to a woman being a secretary or receptionist jobs well suited to women especially if she is attractive.

 

One thing to consider is that in my line of work I do not need to work 40 + hours per week to generate the necessary income that would support a simpler lifestyle.  This is a choice that Powell takes issue with because it challenges the feminine imperative necessitating that a man work at his maximum rate until he keels over from exhaustion in order to provide a life of relative ease and comfort for his wife and children without any help from her.

The woman being frugal in Powell’s example is indicative of a woman being responsible with resources she was entrusted with.  Furthermore her responsible handling of her husband’s resources benefits the family unit as a whole and is a good show of proper submission and discipline.  The family as a whole benefits from the wife’s responsible actions. In general this woman would be part of a small minority of women in today’s society.

Powell strongly believes that a woman has no obligation to assist a man in his mission and insists that a man makes the woman his mission.  He tells us that a woman should EXPECT a man to work for her and if he refuses to do so or asks for her assistance he is shameful and somehow less than a man.  He ambiguously states that men should support a woman’s “heroic mission”, whatever that may entail.  Maybe he doesn’t know either.

So in closing, yes women are generally selfish, although a minority may not be overtly and will try to control their worst impulses.  However a woman basic hypergamy will always compel her to seek out the best deal at all times.  The games rigged so men can choose not to play, or they can play it on their own terms.  What Powell does not like is that men have the right to choose what they do with their time and resources.  Although happening slowly, men are becoming aware that most women simply do not deserve, regardless of however entitled women may feel that they do, all that a man used to be willing to do for them.

It is abundantly clear that Powell has no understanding of how a woman’s mind (or her gina tingle generator)really works.  He seems smart enough and its obvious he has least been exposed to the written works of Dalrock, The Rational Male and Heartiste, but he is blinded by his ideology and upbringing to the truth.  It is not surprising he had, and I am only speculating here, still has problems relating to most women.  It is an unassailable fact that bowing down to women will not get you laid or married for life. The best thing for him to do would be for him to honestly convert to Christianity and find a good marriage believing church to attend in a small town.  He will probable still suck his wife’s ass in the end.  Alternatively, he can shuck off his ideological Blue Pill upbringing as so many of us have done and learn Game. Normally I will not promote or prescribe such things such as marriage and cohabitation in this modern anti-marriage and anti-family climate but in his case I do not think he would be able to fully expunge his feminist beliefs and romanticized views of woman from his mind. Because of this, it is unlikely that he could handle the Red Pill truths we oft discuss here.  Not all men are meant to be alphas and not all men can handle the truth and reality.

Related Articles:

On Man’s Role and Man’s Duty: a counterpoint guest post by Mr. Jesse Powell. – Sunshine Mary
The Cart Before the Chevalier – Alpha is Assumed
Tradcon Arch-Mangina Jesse Powell Gets Rejected By The TWRAs
Hail to the V
What we need is more chivalry!
Chivalry: Falling In Love With Shame
Can Nazbol Misandrists Really Be This Stupid
The gift transformed into a debt.Rejecting outmoded responsibility
Men, You Are A Husband To All Women
WHAT A REAL GENTLEMAN DOES
Chivalry only comes from a position of strength.

By: MonkeyWerks

I should have remained single for more than 4 months after my wife T of 10 years left me.  I needed much more time to reinvent myself before I became involved with another monogamous relationship and the absurdity that such a relationship is.  Jumping into another LTR caused me to become emotionally codependent on C and for more than 6-8 months I was unable to start reconciling my emotions from my nuked marriage.  This introduced problems into the new LTR and hampered my ability to move forward emotionally and in life in general.  The bitter taste of the Red Pill did not help my mindset during this time either.  The relationship was interesting in many ways to say the least and I will describe it and C more fully in a later essay, but the failure of this relationship was all but inevitable.

So I find myself single and I feel relived in many ways.  Her lack of any youthful beauty and her feminist attitudes would have caused me to completely lose attraction for her in a short time, and once I was more healed emotionally I have to admit.  Her excuse for not wanting to continue in the relationship was my undesirable financial situation caused by my impeding divorce and my business challenges, but as we all know it was likely a result of her loss of attraction at my temporary weakness and my request for her help and of course her unfettered Hypergamy.  At C’s ripe old age of 45, yes I know, she is seeking a man who is financially secure enough to insure she can continue to live the lifestyle she desires.  As she has stated many time “I like all of my nice stuff”.  Although she makes her own money she has several large and optional expenses such as two horses and her huge amount of consumer debt.  Her SMV is considerably lower than mine even in the midst of my present challenges, but combined with her financial recourses and my mind and skill we could have made some good money in the next 24 months.  I gave her a plan to eliminate her over $100k in debt in 12-18 months, but aside from that I outlived my usefulness to her.  The only explanation is that an even higher value man is likely waiting in the wings, which actually brings solace to the situation.  That would actually explain her other recent behaviors.  As we all know Hypergamy doesn’t care.

A friend of mine told me that women do not like to see a man struggle.  This is a very true statement, because women have no empathy, regardless of the relationship dynamic.  Even though C was asking me that night what she could do to help me, I failed to realize in time the shit test that it was with both women.  As my wife left me when my business challenges came to a head so did C as I was still working at fixing the financial difficulties in my business and repairing my heart from the deep emotional pain I felt from losing my family.  My mistakes were confiding in her and seeking her assistance, mistakes I will diligently try to avoid in the future.  As Tin Man  and Deti correctly state below:

Once again, another good post – for those looking for LTR or marriage. Once committed, Men will over look these types of short comings in a woman, and in many cases, will help them through it (even if in a bumbling or awkward way). For many Men, it’s a shock to the system when their wife (or SO) doesn’t help them when times are “tough”. In my experience, there is more anger than caring during those times – and a basic rallying cry of “get your shit together” or the ubiquitous “Man Up”.

And if Men ever open up about their “feelings” to these same woman that ask the question “just tell me what’s wrong, what can I do to help?” – God help them. Because if you naively believe they really want to know that you may be questioning your path, your life, your existence – it’s the first step down the path of “losing her” and subtracting from her attraction to you. Stay on that path, instead of reversing it, and you end up minus a wife (or SO).

It sucks – especially if you are unprepared, or unknowing of this dynamic. It is the path of Men to be strong, to show no fear, to shed no tears, to show no weakness – to lead. Anything opposite of those have to be done in private, away from her and others. If you are not prepared to do that – or believe that your wife/GF/SO (or even your daughter as Rollo mentioned) isn’t like that – your path will be much harder than it has to be.

Live, Learn, Lead — that’s the path to creating attraction in woman and living a fulfilled life as a Man.

From MEN: What Do You Wish Women Knew About You?

Women cannot bear to see a Man experiencing negative emotions such as extreme anger, rage, fear, despair, despondency or depression for extended periods of time. You say you want to “be there” for your Man; but you cannot do it. If it goes on long enough, it kills the attraction; it sets off your hypergamy alarms; and subconsciously causes you to start hunting for a replacement Man.

A woman seeing a Male go through the above will seek to replace that Male immediately.

Women cannot listen to Men talking about or working out their dating/mating/relationship issues or problems. Women reflexively view a Man discussing such issues as “whining” or “complaining” or “bitterness” or “sour grapes” or “well, you just chose poorly, so sucks to be you” or “suck it up, no one wants to hear you bitching about it”.

As to both of the above principles; when a Male is involved, ratchet up by a factor of 5 the disdain and repulsion a woman experiences when seeing a Male do or experience the above.

As wrong as the mindset may be, and as much as I would rather succeed on my own, I originally believed I could have reoriented my life quicker with assistance first from my STBX wife and second from C.  My wife assisting me would have been of the most benefit for our family in the long run, and if C helped I would have provided her the status and benefit of my company and my commitment for a time, plus I thought she was still pretty hot.  Suffice it to say that I am actually in the best position I can be in so I can build my new life alone which will encourage my adherence to red pill principles and discourage any future reliance on any singular woman for any type of support or recognition.

As far as my future is concerned, I told C repeatedly that MY MISSION was one of my making and that she could be a part of this plan if she was helpful, and if not she was just a fuck buddy and temporary companion.  By taking advantage of her assistance and how that assistance was rendered, I would determine the level of my commitment to her.  When it became evident I was not going to live for her and her desires or marry her, and considering my current state of affairs, she attempted to negotiate her desire for me, which is a known path to destruction for any relationship, and I knew it.

I refused to court her in any sense of the term.  An older woman with quite a number of previous sexual partners, advanced sexual skills, her reliance on her IUD form of birth control and her Strong Independent Woman mentality does not deserve courtship or marriage, and probably not even any type of long-term commitment.  This is a cold reality, but a reality nevertheless.  She seemed to not want to come to grips with the reality of this situation that she squandered her best with various other men and she incorrectly thought that this was her reality.  I would never commit to a woman who I could not enjoy at least a good portion of their youth.  That’s not to say that she did not bring anything to the table, but everything she did offer had steep conditions and her SMV was pretty darn low, so I modified the level of my commitment and emotion investment in her accordingly.   A good woman who is smart, hardworking, attractive, submissive, loyal, discreet in her sexual conduct and good in bed will usually tempt me to give her the benefit of the doubt, but I have seen that it is almost impossible to find all of these basic qualities in most women.  Because of my emotional devastation and my previous feminist indoctrination from my mother I was somewhat attracted to her independence, but as I became more and more red pill aware and the realization that I would never put on wife goggles with her, I became comfortable with the inevitable end to the relationship and my obvious return to spinning plates with younger and hotter woman.

We also cannot forget that she may also be an alpha widow of some degree for her first LTR of 13 years which ended in her fiancé’s suicide.  This man was a very successful business man and apparently had much experience with various woman.  He got together with C when she was 20 and he was about 40 years old.  She would often overtly compare me to him and although we both have gone through similar circumstances and have some similar personality traits, our application of these traits are much different.  I believe that had he has the resources to learn what is commonly discussed in the manosphere he would have not committed suicide.

I suppose she did not like the fact I was a skittles man, now so more than ever.  Her dislike of my increasing knowledge of the feminine reality became more and more pronounced as our relationship progressed.  It would lead to more of my questioning of her past and the incongruities that became very evident.  And of course we know that all women are in fact like that.

I needed her help right now but because one of her horses became injured she refused to help me.  Instead she told me that she cannot be with a man who makes less than her ($55,000/yr).  Shem mentioned some BS about how men get upset or something.  She also stated she wanted me to make her feel less guilty for essentially choosing her sick horse over me, which I always knew she would do.  I told her that I will not alleviate her guilt by telling her it’s ok and not fucked up and that this is entirely her decision.  She will rationalize it away as she uploads pictures of her younger self on OK Cupid.

She admitted to “gaming” me when we met but I knew I was gaming her best I could under the circumstances.  It was when it became necessary for me to deal with my emotional issues and my reinvention stemming from my failed marriage, my ability to game her waned as might be expected in such a circumstance.  Going through the red pill awaking process and learning game does hammer on a man’s self worth and self-esteem at times as it did mine.

The evening we broke up I mentioned my reoccurring thoughts about leaving the country after liquidating my remaining assets and she again expressed a genuine desire to join me on my adventures.  However, when I blatantly refused her company she broke up with me about an hour later, citing my financial insecurity as her reasoning for doing so.  Apparently my worth only goes as far as the fun she can have on my dime.  In the end it will be her solipsism that will get the best of her.  She will end up alone with a bunch of cats I am sure.

Further reading:

http://therationalmale.com/2011/12/21/fem-centrism/
http://therationalmale.com/2011/12/20/the-feminine-reality/
http://marriedmansexlife.com/2012/12/relative-vs-absolute-sex-rank-and-the-forty-year-old-wife/
http://therationalmale.com/2013/09/10/the-male-experience/
http://therationalmale.com/2013/11/25/nursing-power/
http://therationalmale.com/2012/11/21/promise-keepers/
http://therationalmale.com/2012/07/11/denial/
http://therationalmale.com/2011/09/23/wait-for-it/
http://therationalmale.com/2011/08/25/the-desire-dynamic/
http://therationalmale.com/2012/06/13/the-peacekeepers/
http://therationalmale.com/2012/06/12/smv-in-girl-world/
http://therationalmale.com/2012/06/04/final-exam-navigating-the-smp/
http://rationalmale.wordpress.com/2012/05/16/hypergamy-doesnt-care/
http://therationalmale.com/2012/05/21/relational-equity/
http://therationalmale.com/2012/05/11/coquetry/
http://therationalmale.com/2013/01/17/mister-softee/
https://dalrock.wordpress.com/2012/09/18/female-solipsism/
http://alphagameplan.blogspot.com/2012/09/why-solipsism-matters.html
http://hawaiianlibertarian.blogspot.com/2009/09/relationship-dynamics.html
http://therationalmale.com/2013/11/03/cashing-out/
http://therationalmale.com/2013/11/13/empathy/
http://alphagameplan.blogspot.com/2012/10/shes-probably-had-better.html
http://socialpathology.blogspot.com/2012/03/sexual-history-divorce-risk-ii.html
http://dalrock.wordpress.com/2012/10/06/debasing-marriage/
http://heartiste.wordpress.com/2009/05/19/be-a-skittles-man/

By: MonkeyWerks

Jenny Erickson could have been my wife.  I see so much that is similar in their though process and rationalizations that is so fucking scary, but not surprising.  I was never as beta has Jenny’s husband Lief, but the treatment I received from my wife was the same nevertheless. Visit the links and the corresponding comments and judge for yourself.  This is what is sick with the church and society today.

The Most Abominable Christian Wife On The Internet
 
God never tells a woman to violate His commandments, not even if she is really, really unhappy.
 
Dalrock’s Posts – Great reads
 
Soothing words for the unrepentant baby mama.
 
Don’t forget your 30 pieces of silver.
 
Twisted Scripture.
 
He ruined the surprise.
 
Trapped!
 

How this happened.  Important!!

Reframing Christian marriage
 
Reframing Christian marriage part 2: rebelling wives aren’t to blame for their own rebellion.
 
Reframing Christian marriage part 3: husbands as helpmeets.
 
Reframing Christian marriage part 4: judging the performance.
 
Reframing Christian marriage part 5: sex as a weapon.
 
Godly unashamed unwed mothers.
 

Jenny’s Blog – CAUTION it may make you sick to your stomach and become violent.

http://www.jennyerikson.com/2011/07/12/my-wedding-day/
http://www.jennyerikson.com/2013/06/14/its-just-an-appliance-i-think/
http://www.jennyerikson.com/category/divorce/
http://www.jennyerikson.com/2013/10/14/i-am-as-a-gentile-tax-collector-aka-i-was-ex-communicated-today/
http://www.jennyerikson.com/2013/06/11/how-my-husband-found-out-i-was-leaving-him/
 

 

By: MonkeyWrench

The reason why this is simply because when I met her and then married her I thought we would be together forever.  As inexplicable as it sounds I loved her from the beginning even though I was spinning plates, a term I learned in sales and reinforced in the manosphere.  Through thick or thin I thought she and I would always be a team.  I guess I should have though the whole marriage thing through a bit more and realized our marriage was bound to fail.  She was a hot (HB 8) 19 year old when we met.  I married her a couple of years later and for the 13 years we were together I always thought she was the most beautiful woman in the world to me.  I thought I would always feel like this about her and for the most part I have, even today I see her in this light, although I try hard not to.  Maybe this was because of my love for her combined with her general attractiveness and our time together.  However, one mindset I had to change when we married was my habit of looking at flaws in my previous girlfriends.  Although I did not have a term for it then, it was my anti-pedestalization of my former girlfriends.  I knew this was one thing I had to change from my previous behaviors in order to enable a more lifetime monogamous mindset.  I put on my wife goggles; nonetheless I refused to put her on a pedestal, even though I did not concentrate on her flaws.  Unfortunately she did the complete opposite, as women seem to do more than they do not.  She concentrated on my flaws, and when she left she had such a list I am sure she was writing them down somewhere throughout our entire marriage.  I just needed her to want me, so I could want her in the way I needed to.  She wanted to control me and she used sex and my attraction to her to do this.  It was like I had a hot wife who would never let me touch her.

I was 7 years older than her and that was a benefit I thoroughly enjoyed.  I would even speculate we were both at our peak physical attractiveness at the time, but do to my business and higher than average income my SMV was higher but averaged to be the same as her SMV after I joined the marines and my income went to almost nothing.

Dalrock explains that he, like me finds his wife just as beautiful as when they married.  As men, like many others, our love for our wives grew over the years, even while our wives objective beauty lessened, just not to us.  This is how it should be with husbands concerning their wives, as long as our wives makes some effort to stay fit and healthy, as mine did.  We do not see the effects on our wives bodies by having our babies.  We see it as the love they have for us and our children.  I think of my wife’s youth and her formerly tight body as her gift to me so we could have our family.  I always tried to honor her with this mindset.  I was blind to any of her physical imperfections and even today I have a hard time seeing them, although I know objectively they are there.  What I saw every time I looked at her, is the pretty young face I fell in love with originally.  Unfortunately, she threw this all away when she decided to throw away our marriage.

I tried to give my wife the best of me, and my best was in fact good enough.  Even though I screwed up a bunch in our marriage, as did she, I made a commitment to her in front of God that I would never leave her, and I would not have unless she was banging another man.  That is one indiscretion I will not forgive with any woman.

I will always have her youth and her peak fertility.  That is something no other man will ever get from her, she does not have another youth after all.  My replacement will only get stretch marks, saggy tits, and her now flat ass.  And we cannot forget the attitude and the extra emotional baggage along with her diminished sexual responses.  I must honestly admit though that she will stay attractive for her age group for several more years, at least when considering the attractiveness of her mother for her age.  I figure within her age group she will maintain a (6-7) rating until at least 40 if she keeps the weight off, which for her does require some working out a few days a week.

It is so important that woman marry when they are young.  I cannot stress enough that any self respecting man should not marry an older woman after she hits The Wall.  Those few years at her peak hotness is so vitally important for us men to look back to with happiness when the results of the children she bore can be seen and our wives age, at times not so well.  As men we generally will remain faithful and committed for life to the wives of our youth.  This can be seen in current divorce statistics where men are much less likely to initiate divorce or the destruction of the marriage.

Women are at many severe disadvantages when they forgo marriage when they are young or divorce their first husbands.  Alas, the men who marry women after 25 or so are likely only getting the scraps that are left of her sexuality, her ability to pair bond, her attractiveness and more importantly, her peak fertility.  With older divorced or never married women, men are more likely to encounter women with children from another man, or in many cases several different men.

This scenario creates a cuckold relationship either reactively or proactively, as in my case where my replacement will be likely expending his resources provisioning my children.  I find it terribly disturbing that another man will be influencing my children in any way regardless of his financial contributions, which are more for buying access to my ex wife’s pussy than providing for the children I would imagine.  He will be the Beta who is unable to smell the fear that coming from my ex wife as she approaches the wall at 250 mph.  I suppose she will tempt him with her devotion to God and her mothering skills.  This is likely due to her trying to conform me to the weak Christian Beta male frame.  I hope she at least learns how to give blowjobs for my replacement; he deserves at least that much.  She might even promise him a child.  But as far as I’m concerned the only babies coming out of her are to be mine regardless of our divorce.  It makes sense to have all the kids from the same father anyways and our girls are beautiful and smart, so why mess around with inferior genes, at least that’s my opinion.  I can’t wait for the feminists to jump on me for that comment.

My wife is also teaching our daughters that her behavior is normal.  My ex will justify her actions to them.  I imagine that, like me, they will realize the bullshit when they are older and take her to task for her decision to nuke our family.  Soon after my wife left and moved in with my mother, yes you read that right, I pretty much told my mother that she is no longer a part of my life because of her direct influencing and encouraging my wife to divorce me, and her own prior decision to unilaterally blow up our family when I was younger.  This is a perfect example of the cycle of divorce.  At some point men need to take these women to task for what they do.

This really was not the soft flowery post I was originally hoping to write, but it’s the truth of my life and how the red pill principals, natural laws and social conventions have affected my marriage and my wife’s behavior.  I screwed up plenty also by being Beta when I should have been Alpha and vice versa.  I just wish she would have decided to check her behavior before she left.  I think if she did, we might have been able to fix our marriage, but then again, I probably would have not found the manosphere and would have continued with my same damaging mindset.

Women are at many severe disadvantages when they forgo marriage when they are young or divorce their first husbands.  Alas, the men who marry women after 25 or so are likely only getting the scraps that are left of her sexuality, her ability to pair bond, her attractiveness and more importantly, her peak fertility.  With older divorced or never married women, men are more likely to encounter women with children from another man, or in many cases several different men.

This scenario creates a cuckold relationship either reactively or proactively, as in my case where my replacement will be likely expending his resources provisioning my children.  I find it terribly disturbing that another man will be influencing my children in any way regardless of his financial contributions, which are more for buying access to my ex wife’s pussy than providing for the children I would imagine.  He will be the Beta who is unable to smell the fear that coming from my ex wife as she approaches the wall at 250 mph.  I suppose she will tempt him with her devotion to God and her mothering skills.  This is likely due to her trying to conform me to the weak Christian Beta male frame.  I hope she at least learns how to give blowjobs for my replacement; he deserves at least that much.  She might even promise him a child.  But as far as I’m concerned the only babies coming out of her are to be mine regardless of our divorce.  It makes sense to have all the kids from the same father anyways and our girls are beautiful and smart, so why mess around with inferior genes, at least that’s my opinion.  I can’t wait for the feminists to jump on me for that comment.

My wife is also teaching our daughters that her behavior is normal.  My ex will justify her actions to them.  I imagine that, like me, they will realize the bullshit when they are older and take her to task for her decision to nuke our family.  Soon after my wife left and moved in with my mother, yes you read that right, I pretty much told my mother that she is no longer a part of my life because of her direct influencing and encouraging my wife to divorce me, and her own prior decision to unilaterally blow up our family when I was younger.  This is a perfect example of the cycle of divorce.  At some point men need to take these women to task for what they do.

This really was not the soft flowery post I was originally hoping to write, but it’s the truth of my life and how the red pill principals, natural laws and social conventions have affected my marriage and my wife’s behavior.  I screwed up plenty also by being Beta when I should have been Alpha and vice versa.  I just wish she would have decided to check her behavior before she left.  I think if she did, we might have been able to fix our marriage, but then again, I probably would have not found the manosphere and would have continued with my same damaging mindset.

EDIT: Even after more than 18 months I still find myself comparing every attractive blond to my her.  I hope I will stop doing this soon.