A little Christmas Cheer for the STBX.

As for the girls, like you, I also don’t think they need their father.  You mentioned some nonsense to me before about how daughters needing their daddy’s but I am sure you were just trying to manipulate me into doing something for you at the time and you could not have really meant what you said.  Your present actions speak louder than some wayward conversation we may have had in the distant past anyways.  You and I both know that the courts think the same way and that fathers are an unnecessary component to any child upbringing.  Also the courts are never concerned with the wellbeing of men or how they will be able to survive nor should they be.

Maybe you have another man to replace me that you think would be better for them, or maybe he romances you better than I ever did.  Women in their 30’s are easily finding good husbands to marry them, and you are still relatively attractive for your age so you should have no problem meeting that perfect man to marry you.  And you won’ t even have to settle for any man you’re not head over heels in love with like you had to do with me.  Either way, as you expressed to me numerous times you want me out of their lives, so I am out, and I am making this choice willingly.  That means I don’t want to know anything about them and of course I don’t want any of the responsibility.  You cannot have your cake and eat it too you know.

So I decided that because you don’t want me in their lives I should just forget about them and just go back to the life I was living before we met, which was actually quite fun and exciting before meeting you.  I figure I can enjoy being a bachelor like I did before, partying with various young women doing what I want without consequence and I won’t have to worry about kids or anything else but myself.  It’s not like I would ever get the full commitment of any woman in my life.  I have even been thinking again about getting a vasectomy which I seriously wanted to do before I even met you.  That way I won’t have to be concerned with any more sudden and unplanned surprises.  Anyway it’s not like you really wanted to have sex all that much, nor will we ever do so again in the future.  As for remarriage, I see no point as it was a mistake the first time marrying any woman, because this is what always happens to us men or at least 90% of us because you women often are the ones who decide you don’t need us anymore for whatever reason.  Plus it’s just not popular to marry anymore.  We are only good for sperm donations and its time men should realize this and quit complaining.  The Rules have changed after all, plus I am sure you feel regret for not being able to have more fun when you were young.  I knew the risks, as did you.

Divorce is a good thing because your happiness is the most important thing you can ever strive for and Tara, you do deserve happiness irregardless of what you might have to do to get it and regardless of what anyone may think or say about what you are doing.  You have your pride after all.  Some people won’t understand all the crap and abuse you had to go through being married to me and how you say I committed adultery by looking at porn.  They may even try to tell you the kids will be messed up from their parents splitting up.  Don’t listen to them.  They do not know what they are talking about.  I know before you left me you had thought a lot about how much better your life would be without having a husband (like me) to think about.  Now that you left you are living the dream and soon you will be able to cash in.  All the power to live your life as you see fit is yours.  You have seen so many other woman succeed at what you’re doing such as your mother and my mother and things are good for both of them so why won’t they be for you too.  Both of them ended up very well I think.  Their children are no worse for going through the experience and most of their hardships were only temporary.

I thought this would be the best present I could give you and the girls.  As soon as you file for divorce and expedite its review, you can take everything I have left and rape me with child support payments I cannot afford, nor will I ever pay.  Then I will have to leave the area or maybe even the country for somewhere that’s more interesting so I can be free from you and the man.  I know if I sell the rest of my stuff I can live comfortably in Thailand for a few years or more.  I see no reason to stick around here seeing as I won’t have any more contact with you or my progeny as per your desires.

This letter is not a joke or a parody, quite the opposite.  This letter is just my acceptance of the present reality of the situation, our current laws, and your general dislike and disregard for me.  I suppose it’s the last stage of my grief and all of that so I am now good to finally move on.  I am happy I have finally gotten to this point.  Again this is not a joke, I feel much better about my being single again.  Aren’t you relived that I finally accept the inevitable and will give you the girls 100% so I can go off and party and do my own thing and leave you alone?  That is what you told me you wanted after all so as a gift I am giving it to you.  Sorry I didn’t have a bow.

BTW, Merry Christmas.

  1. Pinkney Masknet says:

    You are insane. Get over it, swallow your pride and get a job or sell your useless shit and put your viable assets to work. You sound like a little girl crying for someone to fix her problems. Man Up Bro.

    • monkeywerks says:

      You must be of the opinion that men should go broke via child support payments so their ex’s can maintain their lifestyles?

      This letter was sent to my ex because it would rile her up for several reason, as thus you apparently and utterly failed to comprehend the underlying message (and satire) that was contained in the letter. If your not a regular reader of my essays or a reader of many of the many blogs on my role then I realize the source of the delusion contained in your comment.

      • I remember reading this earlier this week. It’s totally up to you, but it would be so good to try to stay in your girls’ lives – they really do need you. I’ve known men where the wife makes drastic moves to get away from their children’s father, and it is so horrible for them that they really do give up. Then later their girls never even know their father – it’s so unfair to them! And the men looking back usually wish they had tried harder to get letters or emails or fb messages to them. Anything to let the girls know that their father still cares. In time your girls will see your wife’s actions for what they are. I know the letter is satirical, but it did make me worry that you had lost all hope.

        Maybe it will comfort you to know that in my experience, girls who have their mothers divorce (that had good wonderful fathers that still stayed somewhat active in their life) grow up wanting to be opposite of their mother – of course its a generalization, but it really disturbs them to see life as it is. Divorce is horrible yes, but they can learn from it and grow into stronger, more self-aware women. It’s up to you but I would try in any way to get gifts and letters to them. They will never never forget your efforts.

      • monkeywerks says:

        Fighting to see them trying to discuss the issues rationally and arguing with her didn’t work. I have little hope in reaching any sort of positive outcome. The only thing that will save the kids is the ex pulling her head out of her feminist ass. I refuse to sacrifice my future happiness and potential on a woman or even the kids that will only end up screwed up in the end. She wanted independence or control; well she has all of it now. Moving on is just that, putting ALL of it behind including the kids.

        With the message they are getting the girls will likely end up having similar beliefs as their mother regardless of my actions. I think my method is the best because its opposite of what feminized society wants or expects.

      • monkeywerks says:

        Another thing I want to point out. A man’s mission is not his children or even his family. His mission is his dreams and goals which is family and children are merely a part of. When a man makes his mission about his kids he is sacrificing everything else he should be doing in favor of his likely already damaged children as in the case of divorce. I see it all of the time with men who fight for their kids and end up with nothing. No money, no kids nothing. I also see men who think like me who end up keeping their assets and earnings potential and they maintain a “whatever” attitude concerning his children. These men concentrate on themselves and their mission and they end up happier and more successful. The kids are going to be damaged so why bother. If their ex stop being bitches all is good, if not then they don’t waste any more time than they have too. My responsibility to her and the children ended when she left with the kids. If she wanted to share in the responsibility she would have to do so on my terms only.

        Its like the cuckold who tells the woman and the kid to get lost as he should.

      • Actually I kind of think it’s exactly what feminist society would want, for there to be no fathers.

      • monkeywerks says:

        I was thinking the same thing, but what they want more is for men to be controlled. Divorce court is a wonderful way to do this. Plus it adds the benefit of taking his money and giving it to his wife. The only thing men can do is refuse to participate. Some men will work only menial jobs and others will refuse to pay their ex. The one thing woman do count on is the father fighting for his children so they use them to gain the mans compliance. You take that away a man has no motivation to give anything to his wife. When a man does this he is in the position to gain the upper hand. This is war and one must do everything he can to win his life back including walking away from his kids. He didnt choose the battle but it is one he must fight and he must win.

  2. DEN1 says:

    What I have not figured out is, why aren’t you fighting back?

    So your ex doesn’t want you want you anymore but, that doesn’t mean your children want the same thing. If your ex is as f**cked up as you say she is, then fight. Let the ex know, in no uncertain term, that you will activate the nuclear option, i.e., you will burn through all the marital assets and what ever you cannot liquidate, the lawyers and courts will get

    Fight for the love and respect of your children because one day you may have to answer their questions. What are you going to say to them when they are adults and come to you and ask, “why did you abandon us?”, “We needed you because we did not have anyone to protect us from mom’s boyfriend/husband and did not have anywhere to go.”

    Fight, because all is not lost. Get yourself an attorney and strategize a plan. If, as you have said, she has been having affairs, bring it up in court. Document everything. Have your attorney make her give you a full financial accounting of her dealings. This includes PayPal, Ebay, and those walmart credit card. You will be surprised. I guarantee it.

    Fight, because if your ex finds that you have been blogging about her, she will get the judge to shut down your activities and you can bet these blog entries will be used against you.

    Fight, because you have to keep your daughters off the stripper pole. It would be pretty awkward to go into a strip club at some time in the future and find out that cute thing you just tipped with a dollar bill in her g-string is actually your daughter. Thanksgiving dinners will never be the same.

    Fight, because you are a Marine with a warrior’s spirit. Remember, divorce is a ‘girl-fight’. So, fight like a girl. Because no matter how hard you fight (or don’t fight) now, some time later you will say to yourself. I should have fought harder

    As soon as possible, find a guy you can talk and vent to. Advice from women at this point, should be taken with a grain of salt. This includes your mother. When it comes to protecting a member of ‘Team Woman’, even a son will be sacrificed if necessary. I hope this is not true in your case.

    Above all, PRAY. Hard.

    Hang in there

    • monkeywerks says:

      She can’t touch the majority of MY assets. I took certain precautions before we married because I didn’t trust marriage as a lifetime commitment for women and rightly so.

      The letter had 2 different meanings in it. One was superficial and if you read the links you got an entirely different message. At least that was what I was trying to do.

      My wife was not having affairs as far as I know. She may have acted improperly in the beginning but there were no tells that I can remember about any affairs. I can usually tell these things about women I am with. If she is getting trains run on her it no longer matters because I will never touch her again. Her sexual fidelity only matters to the extent if the kids are in fact mine and if I was ever going to take her back. I will never take her back so her sexual dalliances, if any, are irrelevant.

      My writings are immaterial. There is case law stating that blogging or whatever is protected by free speech. There is a grey area still but she is not identified by name or description so I am still on the right side of the law. Plus she cannot connect this site to me anyways. Regardless what are the articles going to say about me? That I am a bit pissed or that I am banging some other woman? It does not matter if I proved she was a stripper and a drug user the courts side with the woman. That’s what most men don’t see.

      Where you have it wrong is although divorce is a girl fight, I will not fight like a girl. She wants me to fight. I will do the opposite. As of now she cannot take anything. If she tries I disappear. I won’t work for a woman. I never did before. I work for me only. My family benefits by association. When the wife decided to no longer associate, she no longer receives the benefits. She wants a court battle. I won’t give her one because that’s her battleground. The mistake most men make is fighting on the woman’s home turf. Although it may end up there and when it does I will respond accordingly and fight hard, it is the psychological warfare that helps win battles before they start. The advice you give is the advice that causes men to lose. If men in droves did what I did it would slow some of the problems. Because it is men who fight in the courts and finance the very system with the legal fees they are actually growing the problem that is destroying them. If men just say fuck it and refuse to participate or give money to the system, which includes their ex wives, then changes will have to be made. Take the cash out of the cash and prizes and the prizes (kids) are a bitter victory because the woman will be left with a shitty lifestyle suffering as she tries to provide for herself and the children. Men can have more children, older women cant. Its simple biology that gives me the upper hand.

      I will never regret my decisions I make today. If my girls end up as strippers its not what I did or didn’t do but what she did by breaking up the family. This will happen regardless of the fight I put up.

      I don’t listen to any woman about anything. Women don’t have the self awareness to be useful in any relationship advice they may give. And my mother did sacrifice me for team woman already.

      God won’t do shit. Only playing as dirty as possible will win the day.

      You are about 20% there in understanding the problem and women and their natures. Women want to men to fight in court. Deny them the home field advantage. The feminine imperative wants men to think that their kids will end up fucked up and want us to believe that continuing to support them will have some positive effect and alleviate the damage done to the kids. It wont. The only thing that will save the kids is intact households. Even split custody only has negligible positive effects. By denying what she want me to do (fight in court, fight for the kids) it may set the frame in my favor. I gave her options when she left which were more than fair and at least mitigated the harm to the kids. She refused the offer. So I build a brand new life not worrying about anything from my past.

  3. DEN1 says:

    Good luck.

  4. Such mad says:

    Much butt injury.

  5. Great post monkywerks

    I too would do the same thing, fighting the courts & spending insane amounts of cash for split parenting, which she can cancel for any reason is ridiculous

    Then again if i did get married i’d probably hire a hitman, or some thugs to take her out

    Basically i’d treat her the exact same way a criminal was about to attack me

    Which is exactly what women are, theyre nothing more then criminals, petty crooks stealing & robbing from men & calling it marriage or a relationship

    If a woman wants you to pay for everything on a date, while she does absolutely nothing, she’s nothing more then a con artist, a petty criminal screwing desperate men over for access to nothing but a hole in between her legs

    Great blog btw, added you to my blogroll

  6. Prov Erbs says:

    Sucks. I can feel your pain. I may end up there soon, I hope not. This is an excellent and sobering blog. I am planning on reading every post in the next few days. I do hope you can stay in your girls lives somehow, even if it’s by phone or texting without their mother knowing She may be screwing you over, but perhaps in time you may feel differently towards her and want to be amicable so you can keep a relationship with the girls. Anyways, no preaching here just an excellent blog and to let you know I feel your pain. Any advice for me too would be much appreciated. Many blessings on your journey!

    • monkeywerks says:

      Unfortunately, far too many American men have to experience what we are experiencing. Nobody wins. I have still not seen my kids for far too long. There are some extenuating circumstances which I will cover in detail soon with facilitated my absence from them. That said, ignoring the ex does show her that she cannot use the girls against me as a bargaining tool.

      I miss them so much though, so very much.

  7. Tim says:

    In the past 40+ years, tens upon tens of millions of men have learned the hard way that marriage is nothing more than a transfer of wealth scam. The law is set up to strip men of everything they have so that their x wives can sleep with other men. Alimony and child support are tied to your net worth and income, which incentivises women to devalue and discard their husbands. The more you make in the marriage, the more they get to take in the divorce and for many years to come. The kids are “her kids” and the state makes this clear. Marriage is just a way for women to have their cake, and through divorce, eat it too. I’m amazed men get married anymore. The scam is so obvious. I really dislike people that encourage men to get married.

    I wish you the best, sir. Hope you can start your life over and be at peace.

    • monkeywerks says:

      I hope you didnt get that I am in support of marriage from my essay. I happen to agree with you. In the past we had social constructs that HELPED mitigate women’s hypergamy. Because of this I would speculate that not only did most women of old stay in their marriages, they wanted to stay in their marriages and keep their husbands happy. Anyways thats just simply not the case anymore in this age of feminism and feral females.

      • Tim says:

        On the contrary. After what you’ve been through, I didn’t think you supported marriage. I’ve read thousands of stories just like yours and it deeply disturbs me when someone states that men should “man up” when so many millions of men have been destroyed by doing so. I was making a general statement on how many still encourage men to risk all for marriage. Instead of programs that encourage marriage for men, there should a national outreach to bluntly spell out to men how marriage could easily drive them into poverty, depression and/or suicide.

        Agreed. The social constructs and societal values that once made marriage a safe bet for men have been destroyed. In their place are the empowerment women receive by devaluing and discarding their husbands while demanding those same x husbands continue to support them and “her kids”. “You’re not good enough for me any longer – but your money certainly is.” What a scam. Strength and independence for women through the indentured slavery of men. It sickens me.

      • monkeywerks says:

        The goal should be then to teach men, young and older, to avoid marriage and to learn Game. Its the only solution. By men learning both they will be able to once again master their destinies. We most cases we will not get the picket fence anymore but its a reasonable trade off and one with alot more fun.

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